One of the biggest revelations of a seminarian is why am I still here? It is a normal question to ask when you see a fellow classmate decide that this is no longer for him. Knowing that this person seemed to be the total package when it came to being a future priest really makes you start to evaluate yourself. This person seemed to know scripture well and had a great understanding of theology! This person decently had a great relationship to Our Lord in prayer. Despite these thoughts I still find myself here in all of my lowliness. As of June 11, 2011 I find myself here before you preaching and administering the Sacraments and yet I am still lowly and in need of growth. Never in the ministry that I have been asked to give the Church can I forget this fact.
In today's Gospel the disciples looked out upon the crowd and realized that they did not have what it took to feed all the people who were gathered before them. How in the world could they feed so many people when all they possessed where some bread and fish. On there own they never would of been able to feed these people, but they turned towards Christ for his assistance in the matter. They turned towards him, so that he could give them the strength needed to overcome their lowliness and begin to serve the crowd.
Each of us gathered here today are lowly and in need of assistance. There is nobody here today who can say that life is going completely grand and there is nothing that we are weak in. Not everyone gathered here could go onto American Idol or America's Got Talent and walk away with the first prize. It is doubtful that we have a football player here who will move onto the NFL to be the next Bret Farve. Our spiritual life also resembles this reality because we must get onto the path towards sainthood and it is a hard path to walk.
In our spiritual life many things jump out to attack us, so that we may never gain strength, but instead remain lowly. It therefore becomes easy to make excuses to why we are limited in our spiritual growth. We might admire the lives of the saints, but remain scared that we are currently to lowly to give this path a try. It is true that things often seem like they will be easier in the future, but the future never seems to come! In our weakness Christ is calling out to us and has the desire to feed us. Despite this great invitation we get caught up in the world around us and push this voice aside.
In our lowliness Christ calls out: "Come all you who are thirsty." Only if we are able to respond back to this call by turning towards Christ. Christ will take what little we have and He will multiply it to make it so much more. If he was able to do this to the masses some 2,000 years ago surely He can do it to us now. By having the faith to fully hand ourselves over to Him may we pray that we will be given the graces needed to make up for our lowliness. No matter how weak and in need that we may find ourselves Christ is truly there to embrace us and to give us the strength to walk the path that the saints once trod.
The crowds of the Gospel gathered around the disciples and were ready to be fed. Christ was able to show to them the important need of handing over all that we do to the Lord. These people gathered were each filled with their own lowliness and yet they were called to partake of this meal. Here at each and every Mass we come together in our lowliness to receive Christ in His Body and Blood. With great faith we know that through this meal we will have the strength to encounter our lowliness and overcome it with the help of Christ. The disciples lacked so much and were given beyond belief when they dared to come to Christ with their problem. May we take our struggles and lowliness and place them into the chalice, so that we may ever be strengthened by God. If we can begin to invest ourselves fully in this offering there will be nothing which can separate us from this great love.
Sin may seem so powerful, and yet the Church gives us the Sacraments of Reconciliation were the shackles of sin can be broken. Each Saturday evening when I enter this Church I see the huge line of people who have come in lowliness to be strengthened. Now with two priests at this parish we will be blessed with the Sacrament being offered not only on Saturdays from 5pm to 5:50pm, but also on Wednesdays from 3pm to 4:20pm. With this addition to the schedule we will have more opportunity to come to our Lord to be strengthened in our weakness.
Yes seminarians, priests, and deacons are all lowly just like everyone here. Let us never second guess ourselves, but instead come to Christ so that we may be filled. No matter where we have stumbled and fallen Christ is present with arms wide open giving us the invitation to come to Him. Are we prepared to react to this invitation or would we rather stumble about lost with little to eat? No matter what little we have to hand over to Christ it will be taken and made so much greater.
May we not fear to present ourselves to Him at this Mass and within our daily lives for here we can draw our strength!
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